Oh, so if you are against the unfettered ending of life of the unborn, you are a "right-wing extremist"? If you left your family and bravely served the cause of freedom in a faraway land, protecting people you don’t even know, you are now put on the "we’re not so sure about you" list at Homeland Security? This report makes us wonder whether Big Brother DHS is still focusing on those who attacked us on 9/11, and all those now freely crossing our borders, including members or sympathizers of Hezbollah.

Just by uttering the above, we may have put ourselves on DHS’ "watch list,"since we are expressing our right of free speech to speak out against governmental absurdity. Yeah, put all those "conservatives" on your "danger list," while terrorists and drug dealers have free reign coming over our borders. Sounds like you’ve got your priorities in order. Readers, see also Judge Andrew Napolitano’s recent column on foxnews.com, "Six Things You Should Know About the Homeland Security Report on ‘Right-Wing Extremism’" and Bill O’Reilly’s recent "talking points memo" entitled "President Obama, Spain and the Radical Left" and Michelle Malkin’s column of April 15, "You Might Be a ‘Radicalized Right-Wing Extremist’ If..." (We changed the original title of this column after seeing hers, though the substance of this column, including the original title, was written before we saw hers).

Don’t get us wrong. If there really are extremist militia groups ready to bomb the Capitol, Congress, or Main Street USA for that matter, those groups should be stopped, and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. However, to mix those groups with our veterans and "single issue" groups such as those opposed to runaway government spending, illegal immigration or abortion is patently absurd.

Do you think those organizing and/or attending the "Tea Party" protests around the country might also be put on Big Brother’s "watch list"? Don’t bet against it. We doubt that the timing of the release of this "report" just before the countrywide Tea Parties was merely coincidental. The report’s focus reminds us of our earlier satirical "prediction" that William Ayers would be named the new director of Homeland Security, which doesn’t seem to be as much of an exaggeration as we figured.

We may not have many occasions to agree with Rep. Bennie Thompson (D-Miss.), but we give him credit and kudos for questioning the release of such a report. It appears that Rep. Thompson, Chair of the House Committee on Homeland Security, recognizes the impropriety of our federal government trying to chill free speech and grouping reliable citizens into "suspect" designations on the basis of mere politics.

Again, with apologies to Jeff Foxworthy:

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You are a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...and, you are "intolerant"!

...You might not be a "right-wing extremist"...but, you are being watched, and they know where you live!

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

...You might be a "right-wing extremist"...

We know the above is not an exhaustive list. Many of us will think of items to add to the "right-wing extremist" list. This DHS report makes the so-called "conspiracy" theorists’ belief that "Big Brother is watching you" sound quite plausible, rather than the rantings of someone who is out to lunch.

We did OK in math in school, but probably not well enough to figure out just how many "billions a week" is accurate–we doubt that eight billion is, as the bailouts and "stimulus" package are no doubt costing us a lot more than that, but the point is made. We now have a spend-happy federal government that threatens to bury our grandchildren in debt and drag down our free-market system in an avalanche of nationalized control–a "socialist" America on the way.

How long will it be before Uncle Sam owns the banks, certain auto makers, insurance companies, and, yes, perhaps even the local mall? The latest story has the CEO of an auto maker resigning at the behest of the President. Guess who has "controlling interest" at General Motors now?

Federal-controlled "health care" [quote marks intentional] won’t be far behind. Throw in some government-mandated control of radio stations’ programming content, to limit free speech in opposition to this budding takeover [a/k/a the [un]Fairness Doctrine], and the rolling stone will continue to grow in size and reach. So, the 1960s "flower children" thought we had "Big Brother" government then? Who were they kidding?

We are being told over and over, that this is just "how it is," that the government must "do something" to salvage our economy and way of life. Yet, those telling us such either didn’t read the legislation they passed, which contained the bonus allowances those same legislators are now crowing about, or, perhaps, we think they protest too much–maybe they knew exactly what they were passing, and are yelling righteous indignation now that the cat is out of the bag. Those same legislators, led by a president touting "change we can believe in," then passed a record number of pork-barrel earmarks and expenditure items that have little or nothing to do with economic development and stability.

As they say, that is water under the bridge now. However, we are concerned that our country may drown in that water before enough people realize the consequences of the poor decisions being made, and stand up and say "enough." We won’t have much of a chance to express our feelings on that at the ballot box until 2010, and time will tell if a real "awakening" has taken place by then. But we do not have to and should not sit idly by, watching our freedoms rolled up and stuffed into a near-impregnable container of government control.

Please do not misunderstand us. We are not attacking "all" Democrats, and we do not wish ill toward those on the other side of the political spectrum. But, just because we do not want their misguided policies to be put in place and "succeed," does not mean that we wish bad things for our country, Congress, or our President.

Say that again: Hezbollah, a terrorist organization (oops, we aren’t supposed to use that word anymore, are we?), is taking advantage of our "walk right in" southern border, to move Heaven knows what into our country. Hezbollah, one of those extremist groups that we’ve seen on TV, in far-away areas most of us don’t frequent, coming to your neighborhood and ours. Don’t expect to see much said about that by Big Media.

While the present administration talks about increasing security on the borders, that presumably will not include National Guard troops, despite requests from border governors to do so, such as Gov. Rick Perry of Texas. Given that the "open borders" crowd were and are enthusiastic supporters of the present administration, we won’t hold our breath waiting for actual border security to be increased and made more effective. We’ll instead hold our breath hoping that no one crossing our border (or, more accurately, who has already crossed our border) sets off a series of suicide bombs or otherwise attempts to murder American citizens.

Another issue? Have you noticed gas prices continue to "inch" back up? Heard anyone in the majority in Congress talk about the need to "drill here, drill now"? Neither have we.

In addition to the tea bags, how about we all acquire photos of gas pump prices when they were at or approaching four bucks a gallon, and mail the picture to our congressional representatives. Just include a brief note telling them, "if this happens again, we’re holding you responsible at the ballot box next time around–drill here, already!"

The list of mishandled or ignored issues could go on, but we think the prospects of nightmarish terrorist attacks on American soil, while federal spending spins out of sight and federal control grows geometrically, leave a mounting number of concerns.

The songs mentioned above are an effort, albeit small, to do something about our problems, a "musical" tea party, if you will. Maybe playing a little rock ‘n roll and engaging in parody and humor won’t make us any safer or our country more sound, but sitting on our hands certainly won’t. Wringing those hands in worry won’t, either. Neither will ignoring what is going on around us.